When you are about to enter a new stage in your life such as retirement, you may be worried about how you will cope with the changes. Everyone, including you, needs and can benefit from support especially at certain times in your life. These times of transition may be when you reach a ‘special birthday,’ getting married or divorced, coping with a death of a loved one, and especially when you are retiring from a long term job or profession.
It’s a very common experience to go through a grieving reaction at these times, because they all involve in loss and change.
If you become aware of how much you will be ‘giving up’ when you retire and start to feel angry and the circumstances which led to having to or needing to retire, that is one of the common reactions which people feel at this time.
On the other hand you might feel guilty about what you are leaving for others to carry on with after you have left or some of the chaos you caused by not doing your work as efficiently as it could have been done.
Most of all you may feel very sad at leaving, what has been a very important part of your life for very many years.
If any of these emotions resonate then it is important to find the most suitable person or group to support you at a time of transition and change. You must decide what exactly you want. When you know this you can seek the right person who can give that to you. It may be that you need informal or more formal support.
Perhaps you need practical help with physical tasks or someone to talk to about your emotional or spiritual needs. You decide. When you’ve decided you need to ask for what you want very specifically so the other person is able to respond to your request. It’s no good just saying ‘I want someone to help me.’ Because that other person may interpret helping you in a completely different way.
Support is best when whoever supports you helps you make your own decisions rather than imposing theirs onto you.
Your ideal support is someone you are able to talk to quite openly and not feel judged by them. They should accept what you tell them without criticism. In that way you can bounce ideas and discover what you need to do yourself.
